Quotes Dave Barry

We believe that electricity exists, because the electric com...

We idolized the Beatles, except for those of us who idolized...

We journalists make it a point to know very little about an ...

We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much ...

We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citiz...

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by d...

What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may se...

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature....

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from a...

Of course the truth is that the congresspersons are to...

It's income tax time again, Americans:  time to g...

Question:  " I understand that Congress is co...

If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not fo...

People who want to share their religious views with yo...

Crabgrass can grow on bowling balls in airless rooms, ...

In college, Yuppies major in business administration.&...

The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby's grand...

If you surveyed a hundred typical middle-aged American...

Once again we find ourselves enmeshed in the Holiday S...

And that's the wonderful thing about family travel:
...

Just get on any major highway, and eventually it will ...

Without question, the greatest invention...

A Mission Statement is a dense slab of words that a la...

The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expe...

It always rains on tents.  Rainstorms will travel...